I will write more tomorrow morning.
I have a bad cough, I am very busy at work,
and I am going back to a previous employer the end of this month - so alot has to be done between now and then.
Him is doing well after his surgeries, he is considering going back to work sooner than we expected, I am not sure he is ready though.
I have alot to talk about...
I wanted to tell you about "Kasimir" but
havent figured out what and/or how or even if.
Oh and....also..this website will be going away soon
my home base for blogging will be on the Divine Nobodies Network. I will post a link soon.
I am in the process of major transformation.
Please pray for me.
Jesus's eyes closed in my chest on the Vigil was something I have read about but didnt expect inside of me.
I also didnt expect the next day to feel Him wake-up inside me... larger than I could ever expect or even understand.
Woke me up too as I wrote in my Easter post.
Nothing to call Oprah about ....
yet....
:O)
Love K
4.15.2009
4.14.2009
2009 Easter Tuesday
It was suggested to me, by a most awesomely holy=most wonderfully human friend, that I continue my "series" of daily blogs through the octave of Easter, and I will tomorrow.
Now, I want to begin again with Holy Saturday Mass - the Easter Vigil that I attended.
The sanctuary is very crowded, standing room only
I am sitting in the back, the next to last pew.
My pastor recommends a meditative approach to the Mass.
I close my eyes,
I am holding something within my chest
another cough probably,
a lung,
a breath,
lights beginning behind my eyes,
and so it happened..
I saw the face of Jesus
He was sleeping,
His eyes closed.
that's all I could see inside of me that night.
Now, I want to begin again with Holy Saturday Mass - the Easter Vigil that I attended.
The sanctuary is very crowded, standing room only
I am sitting in the back, the next to last pew.
My pastor recommends a meditative approach to the Mass.
I close my eyes,
I am holding something within my chest
another cough probably,
a lung,
a breath,
lights beginning behind my eyes,
and so it happened..
I saw the face of Jesus
He was sleeping,
His eyes closed.
that's all I could see inside of me that night.
4.12.2009
Happy Easter
The blare of the trumpet inside my sleepy soul
sounds the Commencement.
It is heard by my conscience.
What is my conscience?
It feels like Jesus… rising inside of me.
Urging me to right not wrong.
Respond Little clown, let's Love.
Together let's hunt the elusive egg.
React - Rise to the Resurrection inside of you, happening now
4.11.2009
Holy Saturday: The Easter Vigil
Something happens as I sleep in the dark...
the warmth of Your breath on my cheek,
the fragrance of the garden on my shoulder,
vibrations in my ear, my skin tingling...
Your voice purring my name.
Even with the stain of apple still on my face,
could it be?…You actually came to forgive me too?
Awake o sleeper, get up - let’s go on,
I did not create you to be apart from me,
I created you so we could be together.
(FYI today is the 5th anniversary of something happening to me... my baptism ..in case anyone wants to know...Easter Vigil, April 10, 2004 :o)
*****
Ancient Holy Saturday Homily
by Bishop Melito of Sardis (180 ad ?)
Something strange is happening – there is a great silence on earth today, a great silence and stillness. The whole earth keeps silence because the King is asleep. The earth trembled and is still because God has fallen asleep in the flesh and he has raised up all who have slept ever since the world began. God has died in the flesh and hell trembles with fear.
He has gone to search for our first parent, as for a lost sheep. Greatly desiring to visit those who live in darkness and in the shadow of death, he has gone to free from sorrow the captives Adam and Eve, he who is both God and the son of Eve. The Lord approached them bearing the cross, the weapon that had won him the victory. At the sight of him Adam, the first man he had created, struck his breast in terror and cried out to everyone: “My Lord be with you all.” Christ answered him: “And with your spirit.” He took him by the hand and raised him up, saying: “Awake, O sleeper, and rise from the dead, and Christ will give you light.”
I am your God, who for your sake have become your son. Out of love for you and for your descendants I now by my own authority command all who are held in bondage to come forth, all who are in darkness to be enlightened, all who are sleeping to arise. I order you, O sleeper, to awake. I did not create you to be held a prisoner in hell.
Rise from the dead, for I am the life of the dead. Rise up, work of my hands, you who were created in my image. Rise, let us leave this place, for you are in me and I am in you; together we form only one person and we cannot be separated. For your sake I, your God, became your son; I, the Lord, took the form of a slave; I, whose home is above the heavens, descended to the earth and beneath the earth. For your sake, for the sake of man, I became like a man without help, free among the dead. For the sake of you, who left a garden, I was betrayed to the Jews in a garden, and I was crucified in a garden.
See on my face the spittle I received in order to restore to you the life I once breathed into you. See there the marks of the blows I received in order to refashion your warped nature in my image. On my back see the marks of the scourging I endured to remove the burden of sin that weighs upon your back. See my hands, nailed firmly to a tree, for you who once wickedly stretched out your hand to a tree.
I slept on the cross and a sword pierced my side for you who slept in paradise and brought forth Eve from your side. My side has healed the pain in yours. My sleep will rouse you from your sleep in hell. The sword that pierced me has sheathed the sword that was turned against you.
Rise, let us leave this place. The enemy led you out of the earthly paradise. I will not restore you to that paradise, but I will enthrone you in heaven. I forbade you the tree that was only a symbol of life, but see, I who am life itself am now one with you. I appointed cherubim to guard you as slaves are guarded, but now I make them worship you as God. The throne formed by cherubim awaits you, its bearers swift and eager. The bridal chamber is adorned, the banquet is ready, the eternal dwelling places are prepared, the treasure houses of all good things lie open. The kingdom of heaven has been prepared for you from all eternity.
the warmth of Your breath on my cheek,
the fragrance of the garden on my shoulder,
vibrations in my ear, my skin tingling...
Your voice purring my name.
Even with the stain of apple still on my face,
could it be?…You actually came to forgive me too?
Awake o sleeper, get up - let’s go on,
I did not create you to be apart from me,
I created you so we could be together.
(FYI today is the 5th anniversary of something happening to me... my baptism ..in case anyone wants to know...Easter Vigil, April 10, 2004 :o)
*****
Ancient Holy Saturday Homily
by Bishop Melito of Sardis (180 ad ?)
Something strange is happening – there is a great silence on earth today, a great silence and stillness. The whole earth keeps silence because the King is asleep. The earth trembled and is still because God has fallen asleep in the flesh and he has raised up all who have slept ever since the world began. God has died in the flesh and hell trembles with fear.
He has gone to search for our first parent, as for a lost sheep. Greatly desiring to visit those who live in darkness and in the shadow of death, he has gone to free from sorrow the captives Adam and Eve, he who is both God and the son of Eve. The Lord approached them bearing the cross, the weapon that had won him the victory. At the sight of him Adam, the first man he had created, struck his breast in terror and cried out to everyone: “My Lord be with you all.” Christ answered him: “And with your spirit.” He took him by the hand and raised him up, saying: “Awake, O sleeper, and rise from the dead, and Christ will give you light.”
I am your God, who for your sake have become your son. Out of love for you and for your descendants I now by my own authority command all who are held in bondage to come forth, all who are in darkness to be enlightened, all who are sleeping to arise. I order you, O sleeper, to awake. I did not create you to be held a prisoner in hell.
Rise from the dead, for I am the life of the dead. Rise up, work of my hands, you who were created in my image. Rise, let us leave this place, for you are in me and I am in you; together we form only one person and we cannot be separated. For your sake I, your God, became your son; I, the Lord, took the form of a slave; I, whose home is above the heavens, descended to the earth and beneath the earth. For your sake, for the sake of man, I became like a man without help, free among the dead. For the sake of you, who left a garden, I was betrayed to the Jews in a garden, and I was crucified in a garden.
See on my face the spittle I received in order to restore to you the life I once breathed into you. See there the marks of the blows I received in order to refashion your warped nature in my image. On my back see the marks of the scourging I endured to remove the burden of sin that weighs upon your back. See my hands, nailed firmly to a tree, for you who once wickedly stretched out your hand to a tree.
I slept on the cross and a sword pierced my side for you who slept in paradise and brought forth Eve from your side. My side has healed the pain in yours. My sleep will rouse you from your sleep in hell. The sword that pierced me has sheathed the sword that was turned against you.
Rise, let us leave this place. The enemy led you out of the earthly paradise. I will not restore you to that paradise, but I will enthrone you in heaven. I forbade you the tree that was only a symbol of life, but see, I who am life itself am now one with you. I appointed cherubim to guard you as slaves are guarded, but now I make them worship you as God. The throne formed by cherubim awaits you, its bearers swift and eager. The bridal chamber is adorned, the banquet is ready, the eternal dwelling places are prepared, the treasure houses of all good things lie open. The kingdom of heaven has been prepared for you from all eternity.
4.10.2009
Good Friday: A Good Friday Tribute to St. Joan of Arc
Voices of Light/VI. Torture (Voice) - Netherlands Radio Choir;Netherlands Radio Philharmonic;Anonymous 4;Steven Mercurio
(Jesus's Passion helps us bear our own pains and those of our loved ones...Contemplating the taste of gall as well as the taste honey....K)
From Richard Einhorns’ Voices of Light:
the Passion of St. Joan of Arc
The Netherlands Radio Chorus and Anonymous 4
"Torture"
Glorioses playes... Glorious wounds...
Marguerite d'Oingt, early 14th
Century visionary and poet.
Et desiderabam videre vel saltem illud
parum de carne Christi quod portaverant
clavi in ligno.
And I longed to see at least that little bit of
Christ's flesh that the nails had fixed to the
wood.
Blessed Angela of Foligno
Glorioses playes... Glorious wounds...
Marguerite d'Oingt
...ostendit cor suum perforatum quasi ad
modum portulae unius parvae laternae ...
quod ex ipso corde exiverunt radii solares.
Imo solaribus radiis clariores...
He showed [her] his heart, perforated like
the openings in a small lantern...From his
very heart issued forth rays of the sun --no
--- brighter than the sun's rays...
Na Prous Boneta
Glorioses playes... Glorious wounds...
Marguerite d'Oingt
...«non est aequum, velle solum de melle
meo gustare, et non de felle: si perfecte vis
mecum uniri, mente intenta recogita
illusiones, opprobria, flagella, mortem, et
tormenta, quae pro te sustinui.»
..."It is not fair to wish to taste only of my
honey, and not the gall. If you wish to be
perfectly united with me, contemplate
deeply the mockery, insults, whippings,
death and torments that I endured for
you."
Blessed Margarita, disciple of St.
Umiltà, 14th Century.
Glorioses playes... Glorious wounds...
Marguerite d'Oingt
**************
(excerpts from Mark Twain’s essay on St. Joan of Arc – I put the full article in a comment to this blog -
I am fascinated by Mark Twain (a religious curmudgeon to say the least)... particularly I am fascinated by his interest, no..better said .. his LOVE...across-the-centuries-love of St Joan of Arc.
I can only imagine what went through the mind and heart of this creator of Tom Sawyer and Huckleberry Finn, when he first read the recently released (at that time) transcripts, first written in Modern French of her trial. To me it is ironic that his many of his books received the same fate as did St. Joan.)
"...She was deeply religious, and believed that she had daily speech with angels; that she saw them face to face, and that they counselled her, comforted and heartened her, and brought commands to her direct from God. She had a childlike faith in the heavenly origin of her apparitions and her Voices, and not any threat of any form of death was able to frighten it out of her loyal heart. She was a beautiful and simple and lovable character. In the records of the Trials this comes out in clear and shining detail. She was gentle and winning and affectionate, she loved her home and friends and her village life; she was miserable in the presence of pain and suffering; she was full of compassion: on the field of her most splendid victory she forgot her triumphs to hold in her lap the head of a dying enemy and comfort his passing spirit with pitying words; in an age when it was common to slaughter prisoners she stood dauntless between hers and harm, and saved them alive; she was forgiving, generous, unselfish, magnanimous; she was pure from all spot or stain of baseness. And always she was a girl; and dear and worshipful, as is meet for that estate: when she fell wounded, the first time, she was frightened, and cried when she saw her blood gushing from her breast; but she was Joan of Arc! and when presently she found that her generals were sounding the retreat, she staggered to her feet and led the assault again and took that place by storm.
There is no blemish in that rounded and beautiful character.
Taking into account, as I have suggested before, all the circumstances -- her origin, youth, sex, illiteracy, early environment, and the obstructing conditions under which she exploited her high gifts and made her conquests in the field and before the courts that tried her for her life, -- she is easily and by far the most extraordinary person the human race has ever produced."
4.09.2009
Lent 2009: Day 44 (Holy Thursday)
Lenten Journey through the Spiritual Alphabet
Psalm 119, Sustainable Love
Taw (part 2)
Keep your hand ready to help me,
for I have chosen your precepts.
I long for your salvation, LORD;
your teaching is my delight.
Let me live to praise you;
may your edicts give me help.
I have wandered like a lost sheep;
seek out your servant,
for I do not forget your commands.
*****
So when he had washed their feet
and put his garments back on and reclined at table again,
he said to them, "Do you realize what I have done for you?
You call me 'teacher' and 'master,' and rightly so, for indeed I am.
If I, therefore, the master and teacher, have washed your feet,
you ought to wash one another's feet.
I have given you a model to follow,
so that as I have done for you, you should also do."
John 13 12-15
***
Jesus knew what it is like to be the good shepherd.
The paths we sheep wander through in this life are not always through gardens and parks.
Our journey demands repeated exposure to muck...i.e., emotions, anger, fear, self-pity, jealousy, dullard-ness, misunderstanding and other aspects of ourselves we would simply rather others not see.
Look at Him.
He is naked... without pretense or defense,
He stoops and gently washes the
parts that carry us in this journey
that naturally get dirty from the
places we must go.
He does not ask us to prove our cleanliness
he knows where we need washing, and
he stoops and washes us,
and then
he instructs us,
"have love for one another, in this way, as I have loved you”
The Love that shows all you are a disciple
is being naked with Him...
(naked means without the cover of righteousness, powerful positions, pretense or defense)
Disciples become naked together
We stoop and gently wash the parts that
carry each other, our brothers and sisters,
Wash them in the pure Eucharistic act
of the naked body of Christ working inside of us.
The naked Love inside us is our salvation.
Psalm 119, Sustainable Love
Taw (part 2)
Keep your hand ready to help me,
for I have chosen your precepts.
I long for your salvation, LORD;
your teaching is my delight.
Let me live to praise you;
may your edicts give me help.
I have wandered like a lost sheep;
seek out your servant,
for I do not forget your commands.
*****
So when he had washed their feet
and put his garments back on and reclined at table again,
he said to them, "Do you realize what I have done for you?
You call me 'teacher' and 'master,' and rightly so, for indeed I am.
If I, therefore, the master and teacher, have washed your feet,
you ought to wash one another's feet.
I have given you a model to follow,
so that as I have done for you, you should also do."
John 13 12-15
***
Jesus knew what it is like to be the good shepherd.
The paths we sheep wander through in this life are not always through gardens and parks.
Our journey demands repeated exposure to muck...i.e., emotions, anger, fear, self-pity, jealousy, dullard-ness, misunderstanding and other aspects of ourselves we would simply rather others not see.
Look at Him.
He is naked... without pretense or defense,
He stoops and gently washes the
parts that carry us in this journey
that naturally get dirty from the
places we must go.
He does not ask us to prove our cleanliness
he knows where we need washing, and
he stoops and washes us,
and then
he instructs us,
"have love for one another, in this way, as I have loved you”
The Love that shows all you are a disciple
is being naked with Him...
(naked means without the cover of righteousness, powerful positions, pretense or defense)
Disciples become naked together
We stoop and gently wash the parts that
carry each other, our brothers and sisters,
Wash them in the pure Eucharistic act
of the naked body of Christ working inside of us.
The naked Love inside us is our salvation.
4.08.2009
Lent 2009: Day 43 (Holy Week Wednesday)
Lenten Journey through the Spiritual Alphabet
Psalm 119, Sustainable Love
Taw (Part 1)
Let my cry come before you, LORD;
in keeping with your word give me discernment.
Let my prayer come before you;
rescue me according to your promise.
May my lips pour forth your praise,
because you teach me your laws.
May my tongue sing of your promise,
for all your commands are just.
*****
For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life.
John 3:16
***
Heavenly Father:
Love is your just and eternal command, yet
even today, It takes courage (heart) to say the words…
“I am a human with a bit of divinity who wants to walk the way of Jesus”
“I am weak and cannot do it alone”
“I am wanting what Jesus gives”
“I am a Christian”
“I am a follower of Christ”
It takes heart.
Yes, some people get it wrong, and
It is not easy to forgive them, and
it is not easy to forgive ourselves.
It takes heart.
Don’t run away!
Without fear, don’t be afraid of the Word inside of you!
Love is a like bell that is struck in your heart and resonates
as it moves to your finger tips and toes…
other parts of you too… I know you have felt it there!
and also…your throat and
when it rolls off your tongue
and vibrates through your lips,
it rings throughout the universe,
…no matter the size of the sound…
even if it is a whisper...,
especially if it is a prayer that is first whispered inside your heart,
A secret… whispered to your heart from your soul.
Jesus is Love!
Amen
K
Psalm 119, Sustainable Love
Taw (Part 1)
Let my cry come before you, LORD;
in keeping with your word give me discernment.
Let my prayer come before you;
rescue me according to your promise.
May my lips pour forth your praise,
because you teach me your laws.
May my tongue sing of your promise,
for all your commands are just.
*****
For God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life.
John 3:16
***
Heavenly Father:
Love is your just and eternal command, yet
even today, It takes courage (heart) to say the words…
“I am a human with a bit of divinity who wants to walk the way of Jesus”
“I am weak and cannot do it alone”
“I am wanting what Jesus gives”
“I am a Christian”
“I am a follower of Christ”
It takes heart.
Yes, some people get it wrong, and
It is not easy to forgive them, and
it is not easy to forgive ourselves.
It takes heart.
Don’t run away!
Without fear, don’t be afraid of the Word inside of you!
Love is a like bell that is struck in your heart and resonates
as it moves to your finger tips and toes…
other parts of you too… I know you have felt it there!
and also…your throat and
when it rolls off your tongue
and vibrates through your lips,
it rings throughout the universe,
…no matter the size of the sound…
even if it is a whisper...,
especially if it is a prayer that is first whispered inside your heart,
A secret… whispered to your heart from your soul.
Jesus is Love!
Amen
K
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