This does my heart good...

Venerable Thupten Ngodup Visits Gethsemani
July 10, 2007

The Medium of Tibet’s Chief State Oracle, Venerable Thupten Ngodup (“Nechung Kuten”), with the blessings of His Holiness the 14th Dalai Lama and with special permission from the Tibetan Government in Exile's Office of Religious and Cultural Affairs, recently made his first public visit to the United States to offer insights and directions on individual responsibility in the world. On July 10, 2007, traveled from Louisville to Gethsemani Abbey.

On arrival, he was met by Abbot Damien Thompson and taken to visit the abbey church. He laid a Tibetan scarf on the altar and then spent a short time in meditation. After a brief tour of the monastery, he spoke to the monastic community in the chapter room, elucidating the need for the wisdom of Tibet on many pressing challenges to the earth, its peoples, and our collective well-being, including global warming. After taking dinner in the refectory with the community, he visited the grave of Fr. Louis (Thomas) Merton, where he laid a scarf around the burial cross and meditated.

As a cabinet-level official of the Tibet Government in exile, The Oracle’s knowledge is usually reserved for advising the Dalai Lama and the Tibetan Government. This tour was part of his effort to preserve the lineage of the Nechung Kuten and help fulfill a prophecy that was handed down hundreds of years ago to develop a college of Monasteries known as the Dreyang.

Sample love conversation..or something like that

Do you know me?

If you do, you know that I only want to have a reciprocal relationship with you.

Give and take? Yes. … Neither of us giving only and neither of us taking only.

Trust ? Yes. … Since we know each other at our core, our essence, we will always believe in each other.

We are in peace and love with each other.

Peace and Love
Keren

Photo: "Vanitas - life is short why cant we be friends" :o)

We are reflections of God

"be a friend of all people. be aware that others around you may be suffering in silence, feeling alone and disconnected. notice people, applaud people, encourage them, look them in the eye and tell them they are not forgotten or forsaken. don't judge, don't label, don't assume…see every person as a reflection of God."

Jim Palmer (Jim's Memorial Day post...www.myspace.com/divinenobodies)

Without Love I am Half Human

Nick Lowe covering a Johny Cash song
Johnny Cash (Man in Black) also Nick Lowe (Jesus of Cool)

FYI...Johnny Cash and Nick Lowe have a lot in common. I love me some both of them.

Without love I am half human without love I'm all machine
Without love there's nothing doin' I will die without love
Without love I am an island all by myself in a heartbreak sea
Without love there's no denyin' I am dyin' without love
For there is nowhere I can run and there is no hiding place
Sticking out like a sore thumb by that gloomy look upon my face
Without love I'm incomplete without love I am not whole
Without love I'm barely on my feet I am dyin' without love
[ guitar ]
For there is nowhere I can run...
I am dyin' without love

Summer Love

Happy Friday! I hope you have and enjoy a long lovely Memorial Day Weekend.
Peace
Keren

Be Lost in the Call

I've spent a lot of time lately, contemplating “my calling” and my old friend Rumi…the 12th century Sufi (Muslim mystic) has responded to my cries for help with this… "be lost in the call".

"Jesus sat humbly on the back of an ass, my child!
How could a zephyr ride an ass?
Spirit, find your way, in seeking lowness like a stream.
Reason, tread the path of selflessness into eternity.
Remember God so much that you are forgotten.
Let the caller and the called disappear;
be lost in the Call."

You know.. it does seem that feeling a call is the best part, just being asked is affirmation in itself… I can lose myself in that feeling alone! Knowing how to answer has been a struggle and ya know… it is not really important.

"Spirit, find your way, in seeking lowness like a stream" What wonderful advice!

I have received several leads in regard to learning more about Lay Dominicans, and am looking forward to learning about the Dominican way and how the Spirit will want to use me. There are so many options for service...I love being open to options as much as I love learning about them - all part of the journey

Right now, I am looking forward to Memorial Day weekend – the unofficial beginning of Summer!

Peace
Keren

Love Call Verse 3 - What's a girl to do?

No matter what your faith or tradition, it is difficult to fit in a "ministry" when you have an 8-5 job. As a Catholic Christian with a desire to serve the poor, I tried St Vincent de Paul but most of the visits to the poor were done M-F 8-5 and all the other services agencies we contacted to assist in the aid of the poor were only open M-F 8-5. All the others activities, aka bake sale and Angel Christmas tree could be done by any other organization.

I have recently, a little over this past year, felt compelled to begin reading at church as a “bringer of the Word” some call it Lector. Anyone who has known me for a long time will tell you that I didn’t even like introducing myself in a group 4 years ago.

This is not something I do for attention or approval from others. It is actually difficult for me, but I strongly feel called to it, and it does get easier with practice, which I try to get whenever and wherever I can. Long story but I actually feel the presence of my deceased father (my daddy) in me when I read.

What has really called me to learn more about Lay Dominicans, which is an Order of Preachers, is that the members are all there for the same reason. It seems the Dominicans, with St Catherine of Siena as one of their Saints, understand and abide in "practical mysticism", outside of the church walls or confines of a physical limitations of a cell. People out in the real world, many with 8-5 jobs like me.

Most of their devotions/practices of daily mass, prayer, rosary and preaching I already do in my own way. They also serve the poor, the sick, and the imprisoned, etc – Im not sure how yet, but I know they will help me.

At this point, while I would like to, I dont have money or time to go on special spiritual retreats.

This brings me to the bottom line of why I may be being called to an “order” like this....I need somebody/somebodies to actually verbally talk to me, to support me and work with me in sharing whatever gifts I may have that seem similar to the ones they also feel called to in the name of Jesus.

This may only make sense to my Fr. Rminijsa but since this is the only place I communicate with certain people – here it is.

Love you all, questions or comments always welcome
Peace
Keren

Love Call Verse 2

"You are rewarded not according to your work or your time but according to the measure of your Love."
St Catherine of Siena, Dominican

For a while now, I have been praying for discernment on where I should "be" with regard to my Christian purpose... what ministry, etc.

I have been interested in the Lay Carmelites for some time, so I googled them today, in the process, I happened upon a little information about "Lay Dominicans" What I read really spoke to me, so I am considering taking a longer look.

Basically, Lay Dominicans have an ecclesiastical mission of preaching of truth "in accordance with their own life". They are lay people, married, single etc., devoted to prayer, community, study and preaching. Bringers of the Word to the world in our day-to-day routines, responsibilities, recreation, etc.

I don’t really have more to say at this point... I thought I would put it here as a form of prayer and perhaps further discernment.

It is all about Love.

Painting is "The Transfiguration" by Fra Angelico, a Dominican

Peace
Keren

Love Call: Dont let bad define the good

I was struck by the healthcare professional shortage in this country when in the hospital this week, and it is startlingly similar to the priest shortage in the Catholic church. Why would a person want to be a Doctor or Priest these days? We have allowed the “bad” to define the good which is extremely unfortunate for all of us.

While I complained about the lack of individual time the patient should be getting with the healthcare professional, I also noticed the lines and lines of people waiting to be cared for.

Every person I talked to in the ICU waiting room had some concept of God and knew that His will would be done, had faith that He knows best for each of us and took some comfort in that. However, at this moment in their lives no one was happy about it, no one felt free while waiting to see if their loved one would live, or die.

Same thing with being a Christian, we have allowed the bad to define the good. My relationship with Jesus inside me and expressed through others, aka the body of Christ, has carried me through a lot of suffering this year. Equally important has been church, the Eucharist – all the sacraments, the pastor and his staff, the sacramentals, the places of quiet worship and adoration, the people who worship with me.

Fidelity to an ideal has never been easy and particularly not now.

These days, it takes commitment to a difficult way of life to be a good shepherd, a physician, a nurse, a teacher, even the president/owner of a company providing jobs for people. Leadership is not easy.

The reality is not all of us are self-sufficient financially or secure with our relationship with God steadily throughout all of our life. Many of us still need churches, hospitals, healers, pastors, physicians, nurses, schools, teachers, jobs with dedicated responsible leaders.

Many of us also need counselors, advisors to help us discern our talents and gifts and give us encouragement and some direction to pursue a vocation.

Thank you from the depths of my heart to all of those who have answered God’s call to serve His sheep.

Peace and Love
Keren

Oh Mirror in the Sky, What is Love?

My him was placed in intensive care after his recent surgery. (He is home now, more challenges ahead ofcourse, but doing well)

Only allowed certain visiting times with Him was an experience I will not forget. Being in the ICU waiting room, alongside other people with loved ones, many of their lives in balance, totally in the healing professionals' hands, not ours. ..I was flooded with emotions and images and I saw myself in everybody around me.

There is a French saying, “etre a la Croix de par Dieu” – the individual words mean “being as the Cross of through God”, the idiomatic phrase means “literally and figuratively. (Oh those French!)

I was the one who :
Was shut down with fear
Just sat there letting things happen,
Tried to make things better somehow,
Complained about the nurses with bad attitudes,
Sang the praises of the good ones,
Understood how busy they were, there is a shortage you know,
Wanted to talk and who didn’t want anyone to talk to me,
Asked and was asked ‘why are you here?
Listened and shared how our loved ones are the most special person who ever lived.
Went from holding somebody’s hand, to being quietly aloof.

There is so much more but I hope you get my drift.

Thanks to guidance from a couple of special friends….I am holding this all in my heart space with regard to the body of Christ, spiritual growth, my Him, my relationships, community, ministry, fidelity, courage and action.

For that reason probably, this song came to me as I was driving to store this afternoon. Seemed to reflect mmy reflections :o)

“O mirror in the sky what is Love?
Can the child in my heart rise above?
Can I sail through the changing ocean tides?
Can I act out the seasons of my life?
I’ve been afraid of changing
I’ve built my 'life' around you
Time makes us bolder
Even children get older
Im getting older too.”

Words/Song by Stevie Nicks…
Sentiment, mine, exactly.

So what next? I don’t know, but I’m taking a closer look.

Peace
Keren

Spirit of Peace and Love

My husband, whom I refer to as "Him" in this blog, is going to have surgery on Monday. Him has Parkinsons disease but is having surgery on his neck vertebrae (cervical spine) because of some degenerated discs, etc.

It has been such a tough and difficult year for me in so many areas - runs the whole gamut.. financial difficulties, uncertainy, rejection, misunderstanding, friends and loved ones with major physical and emotional issues, etc.etc, etc.

This morning in a group Rosary prayer...I broke down... and blubbered, bawled, cried and sobbed as I was leading the third Joyful Mystery (The laying of the baby Jesus in a Manger – fruit of the mystery “poverty”).

Once the flow of tears overcame me, most of me wanted to run out of the room and not let anyone see me, but I was so lifted up by the Blessed Mother, I kept on praying out loud, I kept on going.

Then after the rosary, people came up and hugged me…Some were crying with me. I have never been hugged by people of different nationalties in one setting. This (Catholic/Christian) church is culturally diverse to say the least, many speak only broken english or none. A very petite Vietnamese lady hugged me first - I am a big robust lug of a person but I was kneeling and my head burried itself perfectly in her shoulder, me sobbing as she caressed my head. Then, an elderly lady from Nigeria, a Fillipino lady, an Hispanic lady, an African American lady (not sure where from), An Italian lady (I think) A polish lady doesn’t speak English but we have a relationship, and a couple englsh speaking mutts like me (I am mostly-Irish-descent/American) ...of particular note... a proper gentleman - probably of Scot-descent/American - whom I love and respect and I know in my heart "loves" me) took my hand in his and squeezed it.

The intention for the decade I led was that our Lord Jesus Christ, lay his healing spirit of Faith, Love and Hope into people's spaces of disease, illness, decay, fear and grief. Im wording it better here, but it was my tears that carried the intention!

I have never felt the power of Love holding me through prayers going through other people like I did this morning, and that was before they started hugging me.

I wish you Peace and Love and all the Tears that come with it!
Keren

A Safe Place to Fall

K. will be moving in Sunday night. It was kind of hard to tell Carman because he has to move out of his little bedroom and into what we call the den, and sleep on the futon, which isn't very comfortable.But K. is 19 and has no place to go. She thought she was all right for awhile living in the apartment in back of her grandparent's store. But her dad works there, and she found out that he was going through her dresser drawers while she was at work. When she stepped outside late one night and saw him sitting there in his truck with the lights off she knew she had to get out. I don't know the whole story of sexual and physical abuse. I only know that K., this young woman I've just gotten to know, needs a home for the summer.

And yes, honestly, it feels a bit sacrificial. Carman and I live in a small mobile home, and a third person definitely makes a noticeable dent in our space -- especially for my son. And yet, as my pastor quoted tonight from John 1:14 in The Message: "The Word became flesh and blood, and moved into the neighborhood." So as a follower of Jesus I need to move into the neighborhood, not just do comfortable acts of kindness that assuage my guilt, not just hand someone a Bible and walk out of their life. I have to move in. Get my hands dirty. Walk alongside someone in need. Enter into all the messiness of life with someone who is in a very broken place.

Once upon a time many years ago, another young woman came and lived with me for a short time. We lost touch through the years, but I always knew that I meant something to her. The last time Sara called me she was a single career woman in her 30s and five months pregnant, with plans to give the baby up for adoption. She called at midnight. She called in pain and confusion and we talked a long time. I tried to call her back two or three times after that but never got her. And then about a year later I read her obituary in the paper. It didn't say how she died, but I knew she had struggled with suicidal feelings before, and so in my heart I know she killed herself. I've prayed many times like that to never stop reaching out to someone when they need me, to always do whatever I can to listen, to talk. To ask my son to move out of his bedroom, so that another young and hurting girl has a safe place to fall.

I'm doing it for Sara. I'm doing it because I want to grow in Love.

Words of Love: How miracles can happen: Understanding

Empathy: Einfühlung
understanding so intimate that the feelings, thoughts, and motives of one person are readily comprehended by another. (my primo-pastor opened me up to the real/true meaning of empathy)

Bristling with Metaphor: from "A Tramp Abroad by Mark Twain"

Keren's note: My Him and I believe that Mark Twain is a master of anthropomorphizing (Anthropomorphize: to give a human face to, to bring to life, to incarnate). To me..also...Mark Twain was a real/true Chrisitan mystic and didnt even seem to know it -but he certainly recognized it in others...more on this on a later post.

Bristling with Metaphor:
[..."There's more TO a bluejay than any other creature. He has got more moods, and more different kinds of feelings than other creatures; and, mind you, whatever a bluejay feels, he can put into language. And no mere commonplace language, either, but rattling, out-and-out book-talk- and bristling with metaphor, too- just bristling! And as for command of language- why YOU never see a bluejay get stuck for a word. No man ever did. They just boil out of him! And another thing: I've noticed a good deal, and there's no bird, or cow, or anything that uses as good grammar as a bluejay. You may say a cat uses good grammar. Well, a cat does- but you let a cat get excited once; you let a cat get to pulling fur with another cat on a shed, nights, and you'll hear grammar that will give you the lockjaw. Ignorant people think it's the NOISE which fighting cats make that is so aggravating, but it ain't so; it's the sickening grammar they use. Now I've never heard a jay use bad grammar but very seldom; and when they do, they are as ashamed as a human; they shut right down and leave. "You may call a jay a bird. Well, so he is, in a measure- but he's got feathers on him, and don't belong to no church, perhaps; but otherwise he is just as much human as you be. And I'll tell you for why. A jay's gifts, and instincts, and feelings, and interests, cover the whole ground. A jay hasn't got any more principle than a Congressman. A jay will lie, a jay will steal, a jay will deceive, a jay will betray; and four times out of five, a jay will go back on his solemnest promise. The sacredness of an obligation is such a thing which you can't cram into no bluejay's head" ...].

Peace and Love
Keren

Carrot on a Stick: Attachment Detachment Suffering Hope

Pondering in my heart regarding Buddha Jesus and Jim Palmer :o) resulted in googling Buddha as mentioned earlier and musing on detachment, and attachment and suffering and hope, paradoxes, etc.

The carrot on a stick represents the paradox of attachment inherent in detachment (vis a vis the stick) - futility with hope stuck inside of it and vice versa. In a way, chasing a carrot on a stick is the ultimate detachment - the ultimate surrender and the ultimate hope - the ultimate love.

It is the detachment from everything even the detachment from contentment. but still being alive.. all the while.. trotting/moving along getting your job done, your work your earthly purpose - the carrot - is the faith hope and the love that keeps us going.

Somehow makes sense to me sort of liking making play out of work... :o)

People at work would say "keren you are trippin" I do need a trip and am planning one!

Jesus and Buddha

Buddha: If you do not tend to one another then who is there to tend to you? Whoever who would tend me, he should tend the sick.

Jesus: Truly I tell you, just as you did it to one of the least of these, so you have done it unto me.

* * * * *

I mentioned the other day that a friend loaned me a book of similar teachings of Jesus and Buddha, and it has been fun and enlightening to read. I just googled Jesus and Buddha and found all sorts of interesting things... i.e., there is a belief that Jesus was a reincarnation of the Buddha. There does seem to be many siimilarities even in manner of birth, and names of disciples.

Hmmm. Ponder ponder.

Peace
Keren

Today With My Twin

This afternoon I am going to a Unitarian Universalist church to listen to my brother's Buddhist teacher give a talk about compassion and forgiveness. My brother studies two hours away from here at the Jewel Heart Center in Ann Arbor, so it's a big deal that his guru is here in the 'Zoo today.

I can write this here. I don't know how it would be received in some of the more conservative circles I frequent. But then writing about it in those circles gives me more of a chance to love others who are different than I am, and gives them the opportunity to practice loving me.

Reflections: Inside Looking Outside Looking Inside

Bailey, my foot, some flowers, a window between us.